Traditional Clam Chowder

We went to spend time with family today. I love doing that on the holidays. We hardly ever see many of them.

This evening we spent time with Jim & Peggy Pippert and family. (Most people know Jim as Dan's twin brother :D) They have a tradition of Clam Chowder on Christmas eve. I asked them what started it...and they weren't sure. They just knew it was tradition. They think it started 20 or so years back. And I bet everyone of their children will do it with their families when they grow up.

That is what I hope will be tradition for us some day. Not knowing why...just doing it because that is what you always do.

Cinnamon Ornaments

I love Christmas baking. But, today I am making ornaments for the tree. They are made out of cinnamon and applesauce. They smell sooooo good. But, alas, you cannot eat them. Torture of the worst kind.

How littles view adoption....

My littlest sister is adopted. She is actually my niece....but was adopted by my dad and step-mother. (We call her my Niester) She is 7 years old.

They came by to visit today. (They live in Roseburg) We try and visit with them at least once a month.

We found out today that she has reacted to Britanie being gone differently than the other family members. She knows she is adopted. She knows Britanie was being adopted. Now that Britanie is gone...she is worried that she could be sent away too. She is actually concerned about her behavior because of it. She is trying to be the perfect child so she will always be loved and wanted.

I never realized the impact that adoption might have on little people. My little sister is a smart little thing. I know that by talking to her about it has or will make her feel better. I'm very sad that she ever had to be affected by the loss of Britanie.

Perfect gift givers

How do people know how to give the right gift? There are many people out there that don't receive well and end up taking all of their gifts back. (We won't mention names) In this day and age...how do you learn to be a great gift giver?

I've been studying this a bit this year. I know people who give gifts to see the look on the persons face when they open it. They want the eye popping action. I also know people who want to give anonymously. They don't want to be known as the giver at all. What do most people look for? Do you really study the person you are giving to? Or do you just get lucky?

President Henry B. Eyring said...."When you are on the receiving end, you will discover three things in great gift givers: they feel what you feel and are touched, they give freely, and they count sacrifice a bargain."

Have you ever thought of gift giving as a sacrifice? Or do you just give because that is what everyone else is doing? Think about it this year. It might be too late for some with shopping season already over. But what would Christmas be like if everyone gave with a sacrifice....gave with love....and gave freely?

Dedication

There is a little old woman in our ward who was baptized yesterday. She is an adorable little lady. She was giggling so much after she was baptized that I couldn't stop giggling. She is disabled and has to walk with a cane. When she does use the cane...it is with great effort. Due to her disability she is unable to drive. And she depends on members of the ward to take her to church.

Because she was baptized yesterday...she was to be confirmed today. There was a mix up in communication and right before church started the missionaries realized that she was not there yet. She didn't have a ride. Someone went to get her immediately. On their way they found her walking alongside the road. On her way to church. She was not going to miss this day. And she was willing to sacrifice anything to get there.

How many times have you felt that kind of dedication for anything that you do? I only hope that I can have the same faith and dedication that this woman has. She has truly inspired me today. I will never forget it.

The rush is over....

We finally finished all of our gifts today. We usually make ours. But, it amazes me how much we find ourselves in the hustle and bustle of stores. We went to get some milk today and were overwhelmed by people. The last Saturday before Christmas. It really makes me feel good to know that we are not a part of that hustle and bustle. What is the average dollar amount people spend on Christmas? It scares me to think of it. I am grateful that I have almost an entire week to reflect upon Christmas without all of the commercialism of it. I will visit friends and families in their homes and enjoy the rest of the season with Joy!!!

For this season.....

This
Christmas
Write a letter
Mend a quarrel
Give a soft answer
Seek out a forgotten friend
Apologize. Try to understand
Keep a promise. Forgo a grudge
Examine your demands on others
Encourage youth. Forgive an enemy
Manifest your loyalty in word and deed
Dismiss suspicion and replace it with trust
Think first of someone else. Laugh a little more
Gladden the heart of a child. Welcome a stranger
Take pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the earth
Express your gratitude. Speak your love and then speak it again.
Be Kind
Be Gentile
~Howard W. Hunter

Once you pop....you can't stop..

We are all done with the cover-up painting. I decided to do a little touch up on the trim. Four hours later I was done with all the trim in all the house. I just couldn't stop painting. I tried and then I would see another blemish...and then so on and so on. I have to admit. I love to paint...and I guess I am trying to look for some stress relieving things to do. So be it.

Painting again....

How many layers does it take of primer to cover Hot Pink and Alien Green? So far...I know more than one. Oi Veh!!!

My husband and I are freaks....

We have been trying to plan a vacation around Christmas. We always love to travel this time of year. We have looked at cruises, Disney World, Hawaii, Canada or maybe even Mexico. Nothing seemed to excite us much. They seemed ok....but not exciting. I mean really how difficult is it to get excited about going somewhere foreign?

The freakish part starts here. We were looking at a new calendar for next year and decided that we are going to Salt Lake City. SERIOUSLY!!! Salt Lake City??? Neither of us have been inside the Temple there. Any of them in that area actually. And there is most definitely going to be snow. We are totally stoked! I think I'm taking too much medication. Dan.....well.....Dan is just Dan:D

We are going to stay at a place called 'The Anniversary Inn'. It is a bed and breakfast with theme rooms. And we will be able to spend some time with very good friends there. But....I think we need to take a vacation class.

Too much stress....???

When I think of all of my friends and family....and all that they go through on a daily basis. I don't really put myself at their stress level. As a matter of fact I think of myself as a person with literally NO stress in their life. I'm pretty laid back. I don't have a job. I can't even think of anything besides cob webs that are on my list of anxiety builders.

I went to the doctor today because I've been having weird head aches. Not really the regular kind. They kind of feel like my bones are hurting. Not really a toothache but something that radiates through the whole skull. I have no signs of sniffles, cough, fever or anything flu related. After poking and prodding she said that she thinks it might be a form of TMJ. She says my muscles in my jaw and cheeks are too tight. I need to watch the stress levels in my life....and she put me on some muscle relaxers for the next few months.

Now all of you moms out there...who are chasing around your children, running errands, holding many callings in church and doing community service....remember that I am way stressed out. I guess more than you guys (RIGHT!) If only they gave muscle relaxers to everyone. We would all be happy :D

Do Weathermen get paid?

Do you remember when you were little. The excitement that you had on Christmas eve? Not being able to sleep. And time seemed to go by so slowly....

I had that last night. Because the weather said we were supposed to expect 2" of snow. I got a kink in my neck because I kept looking outside to see if it had started. But, NOTHING....I mean...NOTHING...is more disappointing than getting up in the morning to a soggy green yard.

Now I know where winter depression comes from...

December 11th

This day will always be a day of great meaning to me. Dan and I met 16 years ago today. I remember I went to meet him at his work. (A gas station) He was the night manager. (which meant he was the only one working the shift) He was bundled up because it was so cold. I remember that all I could see of him were his eyes. But, I knew immediately that I was going to marry him. (Did I forget to mention that I was on a date with his roommate?) I'll never forget that feeling. And I never have regretted it.

We were sealed in the Temple on this day too. At times I think that December 11th is more an anniversary than our wedding anniversary. (We have a lot of anniversaries that we celebrate) All I know is that I love that man. I never had a choice. It was destiny. And I am OK with that. He is the constant in my life. An eternal companion like no other. And he makes me laugh daily. Sometimes hourly.

Happy Anniversary Buddy!!!

Not a creature was stirring....

I woke up yesterday to Kestra growling under the bed. I thought maybe Gauper or Elphaba had gotten to close to her and her chewy. Then she started to bark. Kind of a playful bark. I thought again...maybe the other dogs were down there with her. Until I turned over and realized the other two were with me. I called for Dan. There was NO WAY I was getting off the bed until I knew what she was barking at. After a thorough search....nothing was turned up. But, Kestra was still interested and sniffing up a storm. Why is it that dogs can create so much fear inside you? I trust Kestra. If she says something is there....something is there. I'm kind of creep-ed out.

You know how they say....'the cobblers children have no shoes'? My husband is in pest control. That doesn't exactly make me feel better!!!

Oh By Golly....

I love the Christmas season. I love making gifts and wrapping. But, my house is really showing the wear and tear. We had company last night. I cannot believe what my house looked like and that I allowed people to come in my door. I guess it is good therapy though. At least I feel Christmas-y.

Elphaba

I have decided that Elphaba hates it when I am on the computer. She brings me toys and and paws at my feet. She cannot stand that I am not paying attention to her. If I stop typing and start to play with her....she won't even acknowledge me. But, once I start to tap the keyboard....here she is at my feet again. What a silly dog.

Piano

Dan is in the front room playing George Winston on the piano. Thanksgiving. I am very happy that he is playing the piano...and it really sounds amazing. He is doing a fantastic job. The part I struggle with is that it is my favorite piece of music and I have been trying to learn it for a good 25 years. He got the music from my dad on Thanksgiving and sounds like a professional. I still can't play it. What is wrong with this picture?

(Ok...really the secret is....he can read music. I cannot)

This still doesn't seem fair! I guess it is time to make a call to a piano teacher. I don't have anymore excuses :D

Snow?

Did anyone know we have snow in our forecast for this next week? When I read that it made me giggle like a little kid. I love that feeling :D

New life.....Fresh start

Dan and I were given a wonderful gift this last six months. The chance to know what it is like to be parents. To have a family. To love unconditionally. That gift...even though it was only six months....is something we will always be grateful for.

Britanie has always had the choice whether or not she wanted to be adopted. She has made the choice and unfortunately will not be staying. We are taking her to Newport tomorrow (December 3rd) to her caseworker.

Dan and I are both still quite numb about it all. We have not been able to stop and think in these past couple days. It has been a whirlwind. We do know that it is nothing that we did wrong...and nothing that Britanie did wrong. She has been 'diagnosed' with what is called "Reactive Attachment Disorder". Basically stating that she is unable to attach to anyone. So, no matter who we are or what we do for her....she will never bond to us. She will probably never bond to anyone. That is what Dan and I are the most concerned about. She is going to be out in the world and we will never be able to help her. There is nothing out there to fix what has been wronged in her. And she will be all alone. Dan and I have each other, a loving family and many friends to help us get through this loss. She will have nothing.

It is hard to believe that it is all gone. There is no more family. We will have to start all over and make a fresh start. Of course we know this is nothing compared to what Britanie has lying before her. To grieve someone when they die is one thing...to know that they still live....but you will never be a part of their life is something completely different...and Dan and I love her with all our hearts. That is a gift we will always be thankful for.

Same thing....different year

I remember last year I was trying to figure out what to do about Christmas with Barbara my cousin. We didn't know if we should stick to the Christmas that we always do (Spiritual Christ) or to spoil her and make it a blast. I remember that we chose to combine the two. We gave her 3 large gifts because Christ only got 3 gifts. Granted they were expensive gifts....but, I think we got the point across.

This year we have Britanie. She has no religious belief. She doesn't want to. How do you make Christmas spiritually special for Dan and I without destroying it for a teenager? And how do you make it special for her without destroying everything we believe in?

Why is Christmas so hard? It is times like this that make me not look forward to Christmas. This is not how I am supposed to feel. This should be a happy and joyful time. I wish I could look into the future and see what I am going to do. So I don't have to worry about what I'm going to do.